Say something about gay babies.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
