I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize