Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
If he ever pulls my hair again, I'm going to conveniently have lock jaw. Then he can decide whether pain during sex is still fucking appealing.
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