Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
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