is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I hate it when she philosophizes drunkenly on my kitchen counter. not even sober do i understand latin.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I've replaced you with thin mints and masturbation
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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