the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Randomize
