Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
We have started to decorate penises.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
Randomize
