Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
