"it" just moved
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
