So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
