So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
