Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
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