Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
