apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize
