Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Randomize
