doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
