Taylor Swift is so right about you.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
