East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I can't put those talents on a resume
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Randomize
