Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
operation harelip BJ is a go
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
The FEDEX guy just cock blocked me by getting his van stuck in my driveway
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
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