i think i have two assholes
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
