Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
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