We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
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