What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
What happened to fro yo and sex?
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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