She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
