Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
they're like a gay fantastic four
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
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