I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Randomize
