You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
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