Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
