two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
