You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
