what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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