I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
Randomize
