I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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