I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
