Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize