Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
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