but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
