let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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