Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
