did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize