Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
