Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Randomize
