she was so not down for the gang bang
i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize
