I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Randomize
