That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize
