i already hear my dad disowning me
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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