You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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