I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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