you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
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