I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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