You can't special order awesome
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Randomize